It's either my thoughts are too jumbled up or its completely empty that I could not spew out enough word to form sentences and have a point to convey.
Okay, I'll start with work. It's been moving along, I admit I'm not bogged down with a lot just yet. We're currently in the midst of restructuring, and from this situation it is literally 'The Show Must Go On' while having changes. Nothing stops, and it is actually accelerating. I think these changes are good and personally, I hope I could have a better perspective on things but for now, it may sound cliche but I just have to have some faith and keep going. I do face days when I'm wondering what am I doing and what am I learning, more often than not actually. But I think inwardly from my side, what is important is that I realise it and it as long as I keep trying.
All I can say, is have a little faith and most importantly believe in oneself.
As I'm a person who is happier when I'm busy. When I mean happier, I mean its for my own good. I cannot do idle, not for long hours and definitely cannot be stuck at my desk all the time. It's one of those things that I have to learn to manage inwardly and still working on it.
Note to self: Believe that the future IS bright, things will definitely take a turn. Slowly but surely.
Which leads me to today's series of events!
Wasn't a great day, I could whine and say it's kinda shitty (at some point it was!) I foresee that I will face many of these sort of days. Why? Because it happens when you deal with difficult people. As much as I don't fancy it, its inevitable. All I can tell myself is part and parcel of the job. I'm thankful that I am not alone to deal with this. I have support and guidance which helps a lot.
Also, had a de-brief session in a late afternoon, all I can say is, to each their own journey and to people you may leave an impression that does not seem like you. That is because, people form impression based on their own experience, judgement and expectations. A lot of us do that, and sadly what we don't consider are the series of events that cause the other person to behave that way. Of course, when I heard the comments, I was quite affected by it. It is not the kind of impression I thought of leaving, and also it came from a negative angle.
I thought about it, and came to a conclusion that I had every reason do behave how I did because the situation did not permit me to do otherwise. A question came to mind, do I believe the comments made defines who I am? Or I could acknowledge what was said, take into consideration but know that it does not define me.
I chose the latter
(a little pat on the back for myself :P)
Because, this journey is mine to make... so it would be pretty AWESOME if I don't give a rats ass about a whole lot of things.