A Thursday Morning

Currently listening to the easy tunes of Jack Johnson, somehow it suits my mood this morning. Something to calm myself down, just yesterday I was feeding myself with Monkey Majik. The way my mood changes is still very much the same. No surprise there. 

Five days to go before something very new happens. Entering a very real work life. No expectations, no assumptions just hope for the best. Two more work days to go at H&M. My first real job since graduating, in some ways I consider this my 'gap year'. Gap years are awesome. Everyone should take a gap year at some point in their lives. I feel that it's something so necessary ever since the first time I ever heard such a thing. Unknowingly, indirectly I feel as though I just went through mine!

Silly me, thinking of what to wear on the first day of work. Wondering if I should stick to flats or put on a pair of heels and if my hair should be tied up or let down and if its tied up, then I should really get some hair spray. Would painted nails create a type of impression? The other half of me mentally slapped myself back to reality. What does it matter? Just be presentable, do what you want and be happy. 

Mantra: Breathe in Positive, Breathe out Negative

I have seen a lot of questioning looks from faces from people I know when they see me on the selling floor at H&M. It seems like I am set back a year or two 'career wise' from most of my peers. Some may have call it wasted time, some may say it's a wasted degree. Whenever I could, I would practice saying time is a concept created by man. Without it, us humans will be in chaos. So why call it wasted time when I had hell of an experience in England, it may not be luxurious but what I have seen and done and most probably should have done taught me a lot. Why call it wasted time when my current working experience gave me added value and some extra skills. Would you call it a waste Secondary School education when a person decided to go for performing arts when he or she had spent 5 years or more studying science, Biology, Physics and Chemistry? What if that person had gotten great results being in Science Stream only to pursue dancing and went ahead and opening up her own ballet studio? Truth is, there is no shame in earning an honest living. So as long as you do your best in it. Carry it out with dignity. It is a hard mindset to accept, I find myself getting caught up with the standards that society has chained us to. Some people have no choice, and some people made choices.

All I did was went with what I thought I knew I wanted. Learnt the process, studying it was fun and bearable but somewhere along the way, I could not see myself doing it for the rest of my life. Had a taster from the work aspect of it and felt like I don't belong. 

My aim, keep going, keep growing and keep discovering. "No one else's layers but my own that I should strip"

Well, enough of reflecting, back to reality! Time to head the showers, head to work and have fun! 

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