Suddenly I got into the "mood" again. The one that I was sure I got rid off. It takes such an immense amount of depression for me to feel like that. What the hell is up with me?
Suddenly I don't want it all. I just want to get away from it all. Enough, no longer want to feel such emotions.
Such cowardice. I'm ashamed. To want or think about giving up just like that. What has happened to me? Such dramatic change of character. I don't know who am I anymore. There is not spirit. No will. No fire. I feel so defeated. What caused me to behave this way?
I think I know. But then again...I'm not sure.
I want to cry.
I really need to cry.